liza bean
Dear Mr. Landlord,
Could you please turn the water heater back ON? And, could you please get your phone connected again? It's only the end of March, and as you should know by being a midwesterner, warmer weather will not be consistent until possibly mid-May or even early June. The neighbors are banging on my door in the whee hours of the morning requesting that I adjust the heat back to above 55 degrees. They actually think that I am responsible for turning the thermostat down -because supposedly I like to have numb fingers in the middle of the afternoon- and give me weird looks when I say that I only control the thermostat -which is set at 73 degrees at the moment- and it is you, Mr. Landlord, who has turned off the actual water heater. I have to warn you: your cheap tactics may very well lose a couple of very good tenants because there is no way I'm going to be paying more rent next year if we have to be cold during the spring months, and believe me, I will warn people who come to check out the place! Plus, you won't let us have a dog even when the upstair neighbors have one--not fair Mr. Landlord, not fair.
from a disgruntled-but otherwise pleasant- tenant,
Liza (aka Azil) Falconer
This entry is dedicated to the grandchildren of Harold Oscar Mitchell and all those who commented on my entry entitled "Weee, it's a rollercoaster ride!" from March 16th:
From a very reliable source -a Mr. Paul Blaine Mitchell (a.ka. Liza's dad)- I have discovered that Suzanne has the best memory of all because...there was a monkey at a hardware store in downtown Naperville. Mr. Paul says that, and I quote, "Grandpa got a big kick out of taking his grandkids to see the monkey and the parakeet at the old Ace Hardware".
Well, grandpa, we all got a great kick out of the experience too! Some of us thought you were taking us to the grocery store (which is an even weirder place to find a monkey!) and some of us only remember the monkey on the pretzel packages...and then there are those of us (Krazie) who only remember seeing monkeys at the zoo. But all of us remember having a lot of special times with our grandpa...and grandpa, we miss you.
You know you're in a good mood when...
..your first reaction is to laugh when you leave a note for your husband that tells him "the back door is open" (he needs to know this because he left his keys in the Allmarts car) and "I will be back soon" and then you discover that when you shut the door to make sure that the note would stick between the doorway crack you recall that you do not have your KEYS and you have not yet unlocked the back door, AND what a shame that your doors lock automatically!
..you do not curse when your neighbors tell you that although they have the landlord's phone number they have been trying to reach him all day and his number is disconnected.
..on your walk in the rain to KT, Krazie and Martha's apartment all you think about is what a great story this will make for your blog.
..you do not cry when you discover that although everyone from 603 W. Green is back in town (because you see Ben and Martha's van in the parking lot), they are apparently all gone and perhaps out to dinner. Which, as it happens, was where you were heading when you locked yourself out of your apartment.
..on the way back home, as the rain comes down even harder, you are still thinking about how great a story this will be for you blog.
..you do not throw a tantrum when the neighbors who offered to let you use their phone some fifteen minutes ago are no longer answering the door.
..while hoisting yourself up through your bedroom window and keeping it raised 10 inches with a brick, you stop swearing and begin to laugh uncontrollably as your butt hangs out of the window and your face is resting not so nicely on the luckily very cool radiator.
..after a few moments of screaming for help, you continue laughing as you realize the brick has fallen and the window has pinned your legs inbetween the window and the window sill.
..you do not feel sorry for yourself when your dry-clean only sweater is now smeared with dirt; rather, you smile and shrug, and proceed out the door to get some dinner!
Heehee. That was an interesting way to spend a good hour of my Sunday evening. For those of you who invited me out to Thai, sorry I missed dinner. It would have been some good eating, but you know, it turns out I was busy proving to myself that NOT freaking out during difficult situations actually makes life a little more fun and comedic! Brent will be very proud of me when I tell him this story...
Typically, on Sundays, I drag my feet and dread the week to come. It's called the Sunday blues, and yesterday I was not looking forward to today. But much to my suprise, rather than feeling blue about my break being over I feel refreshed and ready to finish up this semester with a bang! (Do feel free to remind me of this post later in the month- April's going to be a rough one ..) So now on to some tidbits about Florida:
Looking for paradise? If you want to go to a place with tropical beaches, a place where dolphins swim fifteen feet away from you, a place where bike trails lead you to nature preserves and those tropical beaches, a place full of cute shops and unique and AWESOME restaurants, then GO to Sanibel and Captiva Islands.
Looking for diversity? Go to Miami, Florida. It was so great to go to a city in the U.S. where Spanish was spoken everywhere!
Looking for some bonding time with family and/or friends? Take a road trip! Last night, during the middle of a 17 hour haul back to the midwest, we had a two-three hour talk about family, marriage and raising children. I have so many questions and can't wait to find some answers!
Now on to my top three experiences:
#1. I went on a bike ride with Suzanne and I felt so free and giddy with the light breeze blowing against my warm, sun-kissed skin.
#2. We went on a dolphin cruise in which we saw a whopping two dolphins. The guide told us that just the day before- on the same cruise -they saw some fifty dolphins. But did that get me down?? No way! I saw three manatees!!! And I saw a sea turtle swimming along side the boat... Plus, who can complain about cruising and basking in the sun in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico? To top it off, we took our last dip in the ocean that evening after the cruise, and what do you know, we ending up SWIMMING with two dolphins. I must admit that they were a good fifteen feet away but still, how wild is that??
#3. Brent and I went parasailing. I loved it! Before we went I discovered that we would be going about 800 feet high in the air. Silly me, I had guessed we were going to be about 50 feet in the air. Needless to say, I was a bit nervous. But once we were up there, dangling our feet from a very high swing, I wanted to go even higher. Pictures to come...once the film is developed.
Well, more stories to come later. Now I must start on that school work!
YES, I'm finished with that exam!! Now it's time for some spring break fun. I'm a happy lady...check out next Sunday's post for a complete description of my Florida adventures. Right now, I must go live them :) Oh and...
Dear Anya or Sara,
Could you please, pretty please tape Alias for me?? Thanks so much! You guys are the b-e-s-t...
from the second,
Liza
must keep eyes open...
somehow I've done it again! Before this year I had never pulled an all nighter, now I'm on number three (not three nights in a row, three times total). What is going on? I swear, I really did not procrastinate this time! I started on this take-home exam three evenings ago. I stayed home last night to work on it, I chugged along ALL afternoon (and the majority of the evening!) and here I am at 3:38 a.m. and have 1/4 of the exam left to go...
BUT, no worries, I'll just sleep all afternoon and take my turn driving tomorrow evening. Florida, baby! Yeah...
I was reminded today of a rather weird incident in my childhood. During the golden days of childhood -I was maybe 7 or 8- I had a friend who I adored. I thought she was so cool and awesome (in fact, I still do, despite what occurred). One day I went with her and her family to a Cubs game, and we decided it would be fun to travel in the way way back. I think it was a Suburban or something like that. Anyway, Susie (her name has been changed becuase I would hate to embarrass her!) decided that it would be a really fun game to tickle Liza. Okay, that's normal. I squealed like a little pig and couldn't wait for the trip to be over -although it wasn't anything that my sister Sara hadn't already put me through. And then Susie thought, "oh what fun, now I think I'll lick her!" Ummm, not fun for Liza. I decided at that point to hide beneath the shelter of my blanket. It proved to be a very lousy option. Susie was quick, hyper, and determined to do as she pleased. So she made her way toward me and began a new torture. She began to spit on me. So here I am trying to get away from this spitting and licking maniac who had taken over my friend. Finally she stopped, and we travelled on as if nothing weird had just happened. To this day I can't wait to run into her again and ask what in the world was her motivation. Again I begin to wonder...was that just a crazy dream?? Unfortunately, I think not.
up and down, up and down... that's the rollercoaster ride of my emotions. I have this test tomorrow, and I've jinxed myself with worry and down right lack of belief in myself. I can't even get up the nerve to study, I'm that scared of not knowing the material. I know, it makes no sense, but in Liza's mind it's very sound judgement!
One moment I think- "oh I'm so sharp and intelligent!" and the next it's "I'm so dumb, why am I going to be an SLP if I myself have word retrieval difficulties, am lousy at stupid grammar (which, by the way, I am very sensitive about), and can't articulate a darn thought from my teeny weeny brain?!" Professors scare the crap out of me when they tell me that our clients will expect us to be the best in all domains of language. Well, poohy, I quit!
Last week I received a 5/10 on an assignment that I worked rather hard on, and I thought that I did really well. In my head I thought I would get comments like "how insightful, bring this up in class!" Well, I did get a "bring this up in class" but that was because I was so way off that my professor wanted me to share the confusion with the rest of the class. LOL. In reality, BIG deal, it's just a small assignment but for me it was like this slap in the face telling me "Never, ever be confident in the work you turn in!" And here's the thought process in my head "Oh no, you have no idea how to do these papers, you'll always get an F no matter how hard you try. Fine!! Forget it, I just won't put the effort in!!!" Not the best attitude, I know. But then I think about it and I ask myself, "Liza, are you learning?" Sheepishly, "uh, yeah - BUT it SUCKS to learn this way!" "That's true, but what's important?" "Well, the information is interesting and it does force me to think extremely critically about stuff...but I still don't like it!" "I know, but you can do it!" "Okay, I'll keep trying". So that's where I am tonight. Trying to convince myself that I can do it. And for my students out there, I am really sorry if I've been the giver in a similar situation. Oiy, my head's spinning with all the irony and confusion....
I must send a huge thank you to a Mr. Billy Baker for helping me add some colour and spice to my bloggy blog. T-H-A-N-K Y-O-U!!
I am so excited folks. A word of caution- I am about to embark on a trip to Florida so if that kind of talk may upset you...well I warned ya. Although I leave in five days I have officially begun packing. By the way, I had to use my fingers to count how many days were left -how I got an A in calculus I'll never know! Bring out the shorts -of which I have a big whopping two pairs-, bring out the tees, bring out the oh so comfy linen pants, and bring out the itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow pocka dot bikini (actually I don't own one of those but I did just buy a suit that remarkably matches the color sequence on my blog)! I even bought an ever so fashionable toiletry travel bag and have started to pack summery things such as my Neutrogena: Healthy Defense sunblock. (A big thanks to Katie T. for introducing me to the stuff). Can you tell that I've never gone away to a warmer place during my winter or spring breaks before?? This is all very novel, and I have a feeling it will be one of the last chances I'll have to do this for a very long time....
I'm even sitting here in one of the two pairs of shorts, and a not so warm summer tee. My toes are getting a bit cold..and my fingers. Aaah, but a sweater has remedied my cold arms and neck. I feel (and am acting) like the Liza of the old days. Oh those days in my childhood when I would flutter my hands up and down in the excitement of getting to sleep over at my cousin Annie's house. Heeheehee.
Well back to the world of nuerogenic language impairments...oh who am I kidding...back to the world of packing for FLORIDA!!!
I'm sitting here in the computer lab being a bad graduate student. Instead of researching articles for my swallowing paper - a big whammy that has to be twenty pages-YIKES!-, I'm here, post'n on my blog.
Two days ago I had yet another miserable attempt at teaching my undergraduate discussion section. I just can't seem to get them to talk or enjoy themselves...any suggestions? They stare at me with these bored expressions -some even sit in the second row and go to sleep. Then there are my favorites who speak up and are honest and seem to be genuinely interested (it's true that if you speak up in class your professor/TA will LOVE you!). I'm in the middle of trying to determine my purpose/objectives as a leader of this class. I have these moments throughout the week when I feel inspired to do something great. But I just don't know how to reach my students at a real, genuine level! And I get tired trying to balance school with being a TA. School usually ends up coming first on my priority list.
Because my brother-in-law, Husayn, is in Educational Policy Studies, and practically my entire adult family is employeed through various school systems, I think a lot about what education is. I find it difficult to combine the goals that U of I has about education with the spiritual influences that guide how I view the purpose of education. I want what I do to bring good to this world, and I feel as though what I am employed to do, as a TA, is falling short at the moment. I also know I'm taking way too much responsibility- I mean, it's really up to the individual to want to learn. I guess I just want to be a person who can inspire them to do so.
Well, back to my research world. I actually find this part of writing a research paper fun! I enjoy exhaustive searches and finding the most relevant articles out there...
My husband has decided to become a writer -he tells me that he's "even got the stubble down". Ever since Brent shared with me his poems some four years ago I knew I would be marrying the future e.e. cummings... BrEnT f. He'll revolutionize the future of poetry folks, just you wait and see.
For the past two and a half years I've been wondering: is becoming a speech language pathologist (SLP) the right thing for me?? Since I'm on this new honesty kick, I'll tell you what most of you probably already know. I want to become an actress -I can make really good facial expressions! I have even started practicing my Grinch face for Brent- he thinks I'm pretty talented. I also discovered that I am fascinated with radiology. I love all of my anatomy/neuroanatomy courses! I could stare at the insides of people all day long -especially the insides of expecting mamas.... I think I might do some research on the subject of radiology and definetely sign up for physiology this summer. Brent just told me, "You know Liza, you could do anything and succeed, become an actress, a doctor, an SLP, you name it". Wasn't that so sweet and encouraging? Can't say that I quite believe it but I love the fact that I have such a huge fan!
I am fully aware that these photos of the baby can be quite difficult to interpret but go ahead and give it your best shot!
Can you believe it? The baby's a girl!!! She's quite the squirmer too. I think the doctor called her a stinker about twenty times because she would just not stay still. I think she just wanted show off how strong and spirited she is because she knew that today was her first big debue :) You go girl! Plus she was excited that momma and daddy were in for quite a shock...a boy she is NOT!
We (that is me and the proud parents) got to see her scratch her tiny little nose with that itty bitty finger -quite developed fine motor skills for one so young if I must say myself. For those of you who missed it, do not feel left out, Suzanne and Husayn have the whole thing on videotape!!
Well, the proud tia must go finish grading those research papers...wish me luck :)
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My philosophy is that for the most part this weblog is a chance for me to say to the world everything I've wanted to say that I keep bottled up inside. Part of that has been my goofy writing style. And now I'm practicing honesty, with myself and others. I call it "Mission Honesty". There are topics in this society that most people share with only close friends, not to everyone who just might stubble upon a weblog but do you know how I feel? I am going to be HONEST.
And honestly, I'm a little tired of taking this here pill. I stopped a few days ago and perhaps hence the mood swings. Part of me feels free -more like myself- but then there are these moments when the world comes crashing down and I start crying on the way to Schnucks and don't know what's the matter. But I resent being dependent on this chemical. Perhaps its because I still hear people's words echo through my mind: "You can choose to be happy". And it just makes me feel like such a weak person. Why do people say that? Is it supposed to be inspiring? Because its not. It may be true but I can honestly say being told that by anyone BUT myself just makes matters worse.
Most of all, I think I'm just tired of being sad because when I'm sad it's hard to be a good friend, it's hard to be generous with my time, it's difficult to be there for those people who I love so dearly.
But just in case any of you might be worried - overall I'm fine - just reflective at the moment. I've had some bouncy, happy-go-lucky moments too. I just haven't been near a computer to write something about them!
Oh, and "Clouds in the Sky"- thanks so much for the sunny morning!!
Whew... today was a rough one. Don't know why exactly. But man was I G-R-U-M-P-Y. Brent can attest to this. I spent the afternoon trying to grade papers. When I broke down and began to scream at the sheets of paper in front of me I decided that I'd better do my students a favor and grade their research papers when I was feeling a little less angry at them. GRRRR, when I say incorporate your own thoughts into a paper I don't mean try to pass off other people's ideas as your own!!!
Suzanne made me and Krazie (a nickname Brent made up for my sister Katie) dinner -mom's lasagna recipe +Suzanne's cook'n = much less grumpy Liza. Plus I tried pomegranate (sp?) juice and I liked it... a lot. I think I've found myself a new favorite, folks; out with the cranberry, in with the POM. Mom's lasagna recipe + Suzanne's cook'n + POM = even less grumpy Liza.
Sigh. I'm tired. Although my mood has improved, my desire to write about my day has just dwindled. Once these papers have been graded I think my regular spunk may return. Until then, I will end with this request:
Dear Clouds in the Sky,
Could you please clear for a bit? Especially from the hours of 7:00am to 12:00pm Central Time on March 9, 2004. I'd grately appreciate a little sun in my face tomorrow morning. Thanks so much!
Liza (@ 709 W. Nevada, Urbana, IL 61801)
High five for me!
It is now 9:25 am, and I've already graded four research papers. I'm with the fam. for the weekend and suprisingly I've been productive. My mom just asked my sister Sara if everyone is still in bed - oh NO, not this time Ma. She'll be proud when she sees my alert face, moms do the being proud thing well...
Yesterday I took part in a research experiment with Brent. We were paid 25 bucks each to listen to odd noises for about two hours. AND I was told that I have BEAUTIFUL ear drums! Now you don't hear that every day, do ya? The researchers even sent for a super duper special instrument in order to record the beauties. I was tempted to ask for additional compensation - I mean come on, models do NOT work for cheap- but thought maybe I should think of all future audiologists and do it for my people. I'm sure they will all thank me for it...
Well, off to play with the family!
Days gone by in happenstance
a bitter, silent cold
the biting air, the broken care
of winter's endless glance.
The sun does shine
in daylight's prime,
but clouds
become
our moon.
As rain soaks my clothes,
and little toes,
a shiver shakes me warm.
I think of spring,
and then of light (late in the night),
a smile brings me home.
Oh, I'm very excited to have my very own blog!! A-whoohoo... And so I begin:
I dreaded getting up this morning. My husband's insomnia appears to be contagious, and I believe I finally fell asleep around 3:30am and wanted to be up at 7:00am. Now THAT did not happen. Such a shame too because a shower would have been nice before the task that came before me: Swallowing Class (read outloud with a dunt dunt DUN). Today I had to perform a cranial nerve exam. Sound complex? Not really. It merely involves shining lights into people's eyes, pushing on chins and cheeks and taking a nice look into the oral cavity (that's right, a fancy way to say MOUTH). Now you are probably wondering, what in the world is there to dread about that Liza? Well, I'll tell you. I had to stick a tongue depressor in my friend Mandy's mouth with the purpose of gagging her. Gagging her - not very fun for Mandy and not very fun for Liza. I mean who wants to gag someone? Gagging is almost as uncomfortable as throwing up. Poor Mandy. She handled it well, and I got to see that her gag reflex is pretty strong. Oiy. So now I have decided that when someone asks what I will be doing for a living I get the pleasure of saying: " I gag people". Aaah, the joys of speech language pathology. I've been instructed to perform this exam at least ten more times. Do I have any volunteers? I thought not...